Are you a gamblin' man? Are you also in need of a tasty, healthy beverage? If so, roll the dice and snag a can of V8 from our warehouse fridge that have been hanging around for so goddamn long, we don't even remember where they came from!

Regardless of origin or vintage, V8 juice is chock full of vitamin A and vitamin C, contains no MSG, added sugars, or high fructose corn syrup to gunk up your digestive system like all that nasty Taco Bell bullshit you're always stuffing into your head, and is an easy way to get the plant-powered boost you need to bust insane whip skids in front of your fixie foo friends and quickly secure your spot as the hero everyone needs in 2024.

We strongly recommend chilling this stuff before drinking it, but you control your own destiny so do your thing, onion ring.